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Writer's pictureA Golden Dream

Motivational Mondays #22: Love Yourself Enough to Put Yourself First

Welcome to Motivational Mondays!

First things first, what is Motivational Mondays?

Just like it sounds, to motivate, to empower, and to encourage you on the first day of a fresh week. I don't know about you but Mondays can be a drag for me, so sometimes words of encouragement and positivity are helpful to start my day off right.



Motivational Monday's topic is: Love Yourself Enough to Put Yourself First

For no one ever hates his own flesh, but nourishes and cherishes it, just as Christ does the church,

Ephesians 5:29


A couple of weeks ago on Motivational Monday #09: Self-Care is A Must, I stressed the importance of taking care of yourself. So many of us are so used to helping, caring, and/or giving to everyone else that we rarely take the time to care for ourselves. Then we wonder later why we are so exhausted, worn out, agitated, burnt out, or have compassion fatigue. It's because we are giving from an empty glass. Neglecting to put yourself first can cause you spiritual damage as well because when you are exhausted you are not in the right mindset to worship God or serve his purpose completely.


How to Put Yourself First


Stop Expecting You From Everyone Else

  • This is one of the most important aspects of putting yourself first. Not everyone is going to treat you with the same care and attention that you give them. Some people only care about themselves and what you can do for them. They do not care about how they make you feel or what they put you through. They don’t care about what the repercussions are for their actions. I am the type of person that analyzes everything that I do and say before I do it, especially if it involves other people. The golden rule says to treat others how I would want to be treated. This is a rule that I will always follow no matter what the situation is or who they are. I have just learned that not everyone will reciprocate that back.

  • This is one lesson that should be learned or taught immediately. Why? If we treat others the way that we want to be treated we cannot get upset if they do not treat us the same. Some people and things deserve a whole LOT of leave ALONE! All we can do is Meet and Leave People Where They Are and let God do the rest. We cannot become vengeful because the Bible says “Vengeance is mine thus saith the Lord”. The Lord said that he will provide a table before me in the presence of my enemies. He never said they would eat. Let God handle your battles because only he knows how to give them what they truly deserve.


Dating Yourself, Self Care

  • Taking the time to date yourself and provide yourself with self-care is so important. You have to take the time to relax and do the things that you love to do. Make “Me Time” for yourself where you leave and go out for a ride in the car alone, take a hot bubble bath, read a good book, write, or cook a meal. Using “Me Time” is about doing whatever it is that brings you peace and joy. Take yourself out on a date, treat yourself to dinner and a movie. Pamper yourself.


Self-Discovery and Renew Yourself Daily


Create in me a clean heart, O God, and renew a right spirit within me.

Psalm 51:10


  • The only way that you are going to be able to love yourself enough to put yourself first is by first getting to know yourself through Self Discovery. You have to know what your likes and dislikes are, what makes you happy, what your triggers are, and what your passion is. When you know who you are, you will know what your worth is and you will not settle for just anything. You will know whom you belong to, and that is God. The bible tells us to renew ourselves daily so that we can have a clear and sound mind that is right with the spirit of God. By renewing yourself daily you are allowing yourself to be pure of heart and to become closer with God.


Set Boundaries and Leave People Where They Are

  • I know that over the past couple of weeks we have talked about Leaving People Where They Are and Setting Boundaries, but in order to put yourself first, you are going to have to set some limits. If the people or things in your life are costing you your peace and your happiness then it is much too expensive, family or not. People don’t care if they cross a boundary so long as they get what they want. If you are trying to grow and become a better person and the people around you are not, you are going to have to leave them where they are until they are ready to grow themselves. Do not be afraid to set boundaries because you are going to have to protect yourself.


I was scrolling through Facebook the other day and saw this comment I posted on my best friend's page and I wanted to share it.


“Amen. I'm 25 years old and have struggled with pleasing people, it was to the point that I would drain myself physically and mentally. You have to come to the conclusion that some people are selfish and if you let them they will drain you until YOU are worn out and useless. At the end of last year, I declared over my life that I will be selfish because I deserve it. And So do you. You have to be SELF FULL, in order to help people. Meaning, if your cup is empty or halfway, then your burning more than what, you're giving. Let your cup runneth over. So what's in the cup is for me and what runs out is for everyone else. Your cup should always be full. Do not let ANYONE make you feel that you are less than, ungrateful, mean, or whatever. A lot of people are so unhappy with themselves, their life, and their own problems that they feel they have to drag others with them. Put God first in everything you do. Stay encouraged. It's only the truth though. Being selfFULL is so hard. People with good and humble hearts are almost always the ones who suffer the most. Guarding your heart and filling your cup takes time but it's worth it for your well-being and peace of mind.”


Sherronda Best, 2017


This is what it means to put yourself first

  • Stop Expecting You From Everyone Else.

  • Self Care

  • Set Boundaries

  • Leave People Where They Are

  • Self Discovery and Awareness

  • Date Yourself

  • Learn Your Patterns and Renew Yourself Each Day




 

**I hope everyone has a safe and blessed week and I will see you all on Saturday for our Weekly Topic Saturdays**



~Just Breathe...A Golden Dream~


Amen.


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2 Comments


A Golden Dream
A Golden Dream
Jan 23, 2021

Yes Ma'am, I too had to learn the hard way on this topic. I think it was so important to discuss this because if we don't take care of ourselves we will be always walking around broken and not functioning properly.


I think this is harder for people like myself who always give, who always initiate, who always think of other people and then wonder why we feel broke down and overworked. I can't stress this enough, Take Care Of You, and You ONLY!


When you said you was on Negative E, Felt that! lol I was like that for years and was BURNTOUT. Started the journey of Self- Care and what I wanted that to look like. Once I…


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Amore' Bri
Amore' Bri
Jan 23, 2021

Hey Golden Fam,


I think this post is much needed. I know for myself, I spend so much time caring for others that I neglect myself. I have walked around on negative E and running on straight fumes that I end up making myself sick in the process. It is so important, to take care of yourself by taking the time to re-charge our own bodies. I think that you make a great point when you stated that we cannot expect ourselves from other people. I had a tough time Leaving People Where They Are because I am the type of person that no matter how bad you treat me I will always be there for you and continue t…


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